The Room Where it Happens
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Cast List:
Burr | Hamilton | Madison | Ensemble | Company |
Jefferson | Washington
BURR
Ah, Mister Secretary
HAMILTON
Mister Burr, sir
BURR
Didja hear the news about good old General Mercer?
HAMILTON
No
BURR
You know Clermont Street?
HAMILTON
Yeah
BURR
They renamed it after him. The Mercer legacy is secure
HAMILTON
Sure
BURR
And all he had to do was die
HAMILTON
That’s a lot less work
BURR
We oughta give it a try
HAMILTON
Ha
BURR
Now how’re you gonna get your debt plan through?
HAMILTON
I guess I’m gonna fin’ly have to listen to you
BURR
Really?
HAMILTON
“Talk less. Smile more.”
BURR
Ha
HAMILTON
Do whatever it takes to get my plan on the Congress floor
BURR
Now, Madison and Jefferson are merciless.
HAMILTON
Well, hate the sin, love the sinner
MADISON
Hamilton!
HAMILTON
I’m sorry Burr, I’ve gotta go
BURR
But—
HAMILTON
Decisions are happening over dinner
BURR
Two Virginians and an immigrant walk into a room
BURR AND ENSEMBLE
Diametric’ly opposed, foes
BURR
They emerge with a compromise, having opened doors that were
BURR AND ENSEMBLE
Previously closed
ENSEMBLE
Bros
BURR
The immigrant emerges with unprecedented financial power
A system he can shape however he wants
The Virginians emerge with the nation’s capital
And here’s the pièce de résistance:
BURR
No one else was in
The room where it happened
The room where it happened
The room where it happened
No one else was in
The room where it happened
The room where it happened
The room where it happened
No one really knows how the game is played
The art of the trade
How the sausage gets made
We just assume that it happens
But no one else is in
The room where it happens.
ENSEMBLE
The room where it happened
The room where it happened
Game is played
How the sausage gets made
Assume that it happens
The room where it happens.
BURR AND COMPANY
Thomas claims—
JEFFERSON
Alexander was on Washington’s doorstep one day
In distress ‘n disarray
BURR AND COMPANY
Thomas claims—
JEFFERSON
Alexander said—
HAMILTON
I’ve nowhere else to turn!
JEFFERSON
And basic’ly begged me to join the fray
BURR AND COMPANY
Thomas claims—
JEFFERSON
I approached Madison and said—
“I know you hate ‘im, but let’s hear what he has to say.”
BURR AND COMPANY
Thomas claims—
JEFFERSON
Well, I arranged the meeting
I arranged the menu, the venue, the seating
BURR
But!
No one else was in—
BURR AND COMPANY
The room where it happened
The room where it happened
The room where it happened
BURR
No one else was in—
BURR AND COMPANY
The room where it happened
The room where it happened
The room where it happened
BURR
No one really knows how the
Parties get to yesssss
The pieces that are sacrificed in
Ev’ry game of chesssss
We just assume that it happens
But no one else is in
The room where it happens.
COMPANY
Parties get to yesssss
Ev’ry game of chesssss
Assume that it happens
The room where it happens.
BURR AND COMPANY
Meanwhile—
BURR
Madison is grappling with the fact that not ev’ry issue can be settled by
committee
COMPANY
Meanwhile—
BURR
Congress is fighting over where to put the capital—
(Company screams in chaos)
BURR
It isn’t pretty
Then Jefferson approaches with a dinner and invite
And Madison responds with Virginian insight:
MADISON
Maybe we can solve one problem with another and win a victory for the
Southerners, in other words—
JEFFERSON
Oh-ho!
MADISON
A quid pro quo
JEFFERSON
I suppose
MADISON
Wouldn’t you like to work a little closer to home?
JEFFERSON
Actually, I would
MADISON
Well, I propose the Potomac
JEFFERSON
And you’ll provide him his votes?
MADISON
Well, we’ll see how it goes
JEFFERSON
Let’s go
BURR
No!
COMPANY
—one else was in
The room where it happened
BURR AND COMPANY
The room where it happened
The room where it happened
No one else was in
The room where it happened
The room where it happened
The room where it happened
BURR
My God!
BURR AND COMPANY
In God we trust
But we’ll never really know what got discussed
Click-boom then it happened
BURR
And no one else was in the room where it happened
COMPANY
Alexander Hamilton!
BURR
What did they say to you to get you to sell New York City down the river?
COMPANY
Alexander Hamilton!
BURR
Did Washington know about the dinner?
Was there Presidential pressure to deliver?
COMPANY
Alexander Hamilton!
BURR
Or did you know, even then, it doesn’t matter
Where you put the U.S. Capital?
HAMILTON
Cuz we’ll have the banks
We’re in the same spot
BURR
You got more than you gave
HAMILTON
And I wanted what I got
When you got skin in the game, you stay in the game
But you don’t get a win unless you play in the game
Oh, you get love for it. You get hate for it
You get nothing if you…
HAMILTON AND COMPANY
Wait for it, wait for it, wait!
HAMILTON
God help and forgive me
I wanna build
Something that’s gonna
Outlive me
HAMILTON/JEFFERSON/MADISON/WASHINGTON
What do you want, Burr?
What do you want, Burr?
If you stand for nothing
Burr, then what do you fall for?
COMPANY
What do you want, Burr?
What do you want, Burr?
What do you want, Burr?
What do you want?
BURR
I
Wanna be in
The room where it happens
The room where it happens
I
Wanna be in
The room where it happens
The room where it happens
BURR
I
Wanna be
In the room where it happens
I
I wanna be in the room…
Oh
Oh
I wanna be
I wanna be
I’ve got to be
I’ve got to be
In that room
In that big ol’ room
COMPANY
I wanna be in
The room where it happens
The room where it happens
The room where it happens
I wanna be in the room
Where it happens
The room where it happens
The room where it happens
I wanna be in
The room where it happens
The room where it happens
The room where it happens
I wanna be in
The room where it happens
The room where it happens
The room where it happens.
COMPANY
The art of the compromise—
BURR
Hold your nose and close your eyes
COMPANY
We want our leaders to save the day—
BURR
But we don’t get a say in what they trade away
COMPANY
We dream of a brand new start—
BURR
But we dream in the dark for the most part
BURR AND COMPANY
Dark as a tomb where it happens
BURR
I’ve got to be in
The room…
I’ve got to be...
I’ve got to be...
Oh, I’ve got to be in
The room where it happens…
I’ve got to be, I’ve gotta be, I’ve gotta be…
In the room!
Click-boom!
COMPANY
The room where it happens
The room where it happens
The room where it happens
The room where it happens
The room where it happens
I wanna be in the room
Where it happens!
Click-boom!